View Full Version : The Perks of Being Over 50

06-29-2013, 05:58 AM
With all these cracks about age in the Newell Owners thread. I thought this would be appropriate for us over 50. lol!

The Perks of Being Over 50

Your supply of brain cells is finally down to manageable size.

Your secrets are safe with your friends because they can't remember them either.

You sing along with elevator music.

Your joints are more accurate meteorologists than the national weather service.

You have a party and the neighbors don't even realize it.

People call at 9 PM and ask, "Did I wake you?"

People no longer view you as a hypochondriac.

Things you buy now won't wear out.

You can live without sex but not without glasses.

You enjoy hearing about other peoples operations.

You get into heated arguments about pension plans.

You can eat dinner at 4 P.M.

There is nothing left to learn the hard way.

You no longer think of speed limits as a challenge.

You quit trying to hold your stomach in, no matter who walks into the room.

Your eyes won't get much worse.

Your investment in health insurance is finally beginning to pay off.

You can't remember who sent you this list.

06-29-2013, 07:00 AM
Sorry, but I don't agree with 14, hasn't been that long since I set my cruise at 135 in Montana. Most of the others are spot on.rollinglol

06-29-2013, 02:35 PM
Jon, would 19 be: You can give your wife a bathroom scale to support her desired wishes? I'm still laughing on that one.rollinglol

06-29-2013, 03:26 PM
I told Ken a variation of this on the phone as if it happened to me:

My wife was hinting about what she wanted for our upcoming
She said, "I want something shiny that goes from 0 to 150 in
about 3 seconds."
I bought her a bathroom scale.
And then the fight started......